Three Simple Steps to Transform Your Worries

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Three Simple Steps to Transform Your Worries
by Ginny Williams

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“Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow. It only saps today of its joy.” ~ Leo Buscaglia

They show up before you even open your eyes in the morning, a non-stop stream of tangled worries about work,
relationships, health, and finances. Worries can stay with you throughout your day, interrupting your focus whether
you’re trying to work or relax. Worrying can become so automatic that you may not even question where your
thoughts come from, or how to stop them.

Worrying is a learned behavior that can become an unconscious habit over time. Having concerns about the future
or regrets about the past is normal, and it serves an important purpose in human survival. But there’s a big
difference between working through a problem or challenge, versus being held hostage by your own thoughts.
Worrying stifles spontaneity and creativity, the very skills we all need to learn, grow and succeed. Worrying not only
robs you of peace of mind, it prevents you from being fully present no matter who you’re with or what you’re doing.
Worrying interferes with your ability to enjoy what should be enjoyable.

Simply saying, “Don’t worry, be happy” is not the solution. Because worrying is a habit it requires you to learn a
new way of thinking. If you’d like to reclaim ownership of your mind and thoughts, try these three steps to retrain
your brain:

1.Recognize when you’re worrying. Begin by observing your thoughts and questioning the ones that seem like
worries. Periodically throughout your day ask yourself, “What am I thinking about? Oh, I’m thinking about overdue
bills. I’m worrying about my elderly mother. I’m stressing over my work.” Then ask yourself, “Is this the right time to
be thinking about this situation? Is there anything I can do about this situation right now?” Put your Inner Worrier
on notice that you are now paying attention.

2.Release the worrying thought. Once you become aware of your pattern of worrying, it’s time to let go of the ones
causing you unnecessary anxiety. If you tend to think in images, visualize the worry as vividly as you can, then see
it evaporating. If it’s easier to use words to describe your concern, write your worry on a mental blackboard, then
mentally erase it. Or picture yourself putting your worries into a container, and then lock the container and throw
away the key. The idea is to push your troubling thoughts aside so you can welcome in thoughts that are more
positive and productive.

3.Replace the worry with a better thought. Make a list of people, places and things that consistently make you feel
good and keep photos of them nearby. Your response when you see the images should be a genuine and
automatic smile. Then consult your list when your worrying begins to consume you. Just like breaking any other
habit, you need to be ready to retrain your brain when a repetitive worry creeps in.

Finally, remember that worries are living rent-free in your mind. The goal is to evict the ones you don’t want and
open up the space for a quieter tenant to move in. If a worry begs for your attention but right now you’d just like to
relax, remember the philosophy that Scarlett O’Hara‘s made famous in Gone with the Wind: “I’ll think about that
tomorrow.”

Ginny Williams is a professional life coach based in Plum Island, MA specializing in life transitions. Coach Ginny can
be reached at (978) 462-2334, email Ginny@CoachGinny.com or at www.coachginny.com